Counselling in Penticton & Okanagan Area

My work with couples is focused on the premise that most of us do not have the tools and perspectives to create healthy, empowered, choice-full relationships (How were we supposed to learn these things?–our own parents’ relationship? School? T.V?)

Much of what we are doing in relationships is reacting, rather than responding, to our partners, and they, in turn, react to our reactions. In addition, we choose partners who trigger our unfinished business in the most intense ways. We do so because our partners are the very people who provoke the stretching and growth we need to do to become the best versions of ourselves.

Some couples, however, never get past the power struggle/blame stage and either remain married and live emotionally disconnected, resentful lives, or end their marriage in divorce.

There is another option!  How about a passionate partnership? Or at the very least, more compassion and kindness towards your partner and yourself?

What To Expect:

I encourage couples to see me together for the first session, after which a single individual session with each partner might be advised. Occasionally, I see only one individual in the relationship (perhaps because one partner refuses to come). In some cases, one person working on themselves is enough to shift the dynamic.

Session length varies between 60-75 minutes. Some couples can only come in for a few sessions because budget prohibits a longer commitment. They will learn valuable tools and perspectives regardless of how long they attend.

During counselling, our work is directed at improving your connection with yourself and your partner, and owning your own part in the disconnection. Ideally, the way you see your yourself and your partner will change, and what you see as possible for your relationship will transform.

 Goals:

Goals include improving your relationship with yourself (which is the template for all other relationships), improving and expanding the way you see your partner, and identifying the box you may have put your relationship in. Other goals include much better communication, identifying expectations, and learning healthier personal boundaries. Work is toward greater intimacy that is built with compassion, realistic expectations, and effective communication.